Month: March 2024

Wisdom From Three Stoics for Leaders

The Stoics are popular today because they believed in self-development, resilience, and focusing on things within your control.

Wisdom from the Stoics for Leaders:

The reason learning is hard:

Life is hard when you learn slowly.

“Throw out your conceited opinions, for it is impossible for a person to begin to learn what he thinks he already knows.” Epictetus, Discourses, 2.17.1

That clicking sound you hear is the sound of everyone’s brain turning off when you show up with all the answers.

You learn when you ask questions.

Application: Show up stupid.

Keep track of how many questions you ask in conversations. Set a goal to begin and end conversations with a question.

Begin conversations with, “What would you love to take away from our conversation?” End with, “What’s your takeaway from our conversation?”

Don’t let brilliance prevent learning. Debono said it best, “Those who think they know, don’t.”

The path to tranquility:

People who can’t say no live frantic lives.

“If you seek tranquility, do less. Or (more accurately) do what’s essential.” Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 4.22.

High aspiration people squander their talent by doing too much.

Application: Help people identify essentials.

When people feel stressed ask, “What do you need to stop?”

Refocus on the big picture when people feel confused. “What are you trying to achieve?”

Help the overwhelmed by asking, “What’s one thing you can do today to move the agenda forward?”

The reluctance to confessing faults:

Denial and defensiveness indicate blind spots.

“Why will no man confess his faults? Because he is still in their grasp…” Seneca, Letters from a Stoic, #LII.

Application: They might be right.

When someone hints you have a fault ask yourself, “How might this be right?” Or “What am I doing that led someone to think this?”

Which bit of wisdom from the Stoics would you love leaders to embrace today?

Which bit of wisdom from the Stoics are you already practicing? How has it helped you?

Still curious:

3 Surprising Quotes from Sir Edmund Hillary that Contradict Established Thinking

7 Reasons to Live

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3 Challenges an Introvert Faces in Leadership

“There are two categories of people in the world, those who divide the world into two categories and those who don’t.” Unattributed

I was asked what I would say to introverts who aspire to leadership. It seems like introversion might hinder you in leadership. My reply, “If you’re an introvert, good for you. Introverts make great leaders. Yes, they face challenges. Who doesn’t?”

Thank Carl Jung if you’ve been labeled an introvert (1923). And his theory of personality is foundational to The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (1940s).

Don’t use any label as an excuse for incompetence in any core leadership skill. Leadership can be learned.

3 challenges an introvert faces in leadership:

#1. Intimidation:

You might question your ability to lead if you avoid the front of the room. Don’t let that bother you. Great leaders help others rise.

Suggestions:

1. Use exposure therapy. Talk in front of people every chance you get.
2. Encourage people on your team to rise. We love leaders who help us shine.
3. Give yourself some encouragement. Negative self-talk defeats people.
4. Build on small success. If you can speak in front of 10 you can speak in front of 1,000.

#2. Bias:

Quietness seems weak. Extroverts seem confident.

“… 65% of senior corporate executives viewed introversion as a barrier to leadership…” (HBR)

Suggestions:

1. Anticipate questions and develop responses before you need them.
2. Avoid defensiveness when you speak up. Focus on the message. What’s important?
3. Ask open questions when you listen. Perceptive questions project confidence.
4. Validate others, but don’t say, “I wish I was confident like you.”
5. Seek feedback on things you do that might project weakness.

#3. Misjudgment:

You might be labeled negative because your think-face is your stink-face.

Suggestion:

Nod and smile when people talk to you. My friend tells me to stop frowning. Raise your eyebrows.

What suggestions do you have for the “quiet people” who aspire to lead?

Are you a “quiet person”? How did you rise to leadership?

Still curious:

The Scariest Thing about Introverts

What’s Wrong with Introverts

How Introverts Succeed in an Extrovert World

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Our world is brimming with advice and advice givers. From the best books to read, the hottest stocks to buy, to the most effective weight loss strategies, everyone seems to have a suggestion. But here’s the catch – the question of credibility is paramount. It’s not just about what is being recommended, but who is doing the recommending.

Expertise matters. In an age where information is as abundant as it is accessible, the real challenge lies not in finding advice, but in finding advice worth following. “Though leadership” has become an overused bromide, and rather than bestowed by others (as it should be), it is often made by the supposed “thought leader” as a self-aggrandizing claim.

Consider the difference between a friend recommending a stock based on a hunch and a seasoned financial analyst with years of successful investing under their belt. Or the difference between a celebrity-endorsed diet plan and one created by a registered dietitian. The weight of their expertise—or lack thereof—significantly affects the value of their advice.

Beware the enticing invite from an unknown source. Learn to discern the credible from the questionable. Look for evidence of their expertise: certifications, publications and actual successes. Nassim Taleb said the best way to find a financial advisor is to learn if they’ve invested in what they’re recommending, i.e. they have skin in the game.

Good advice comes from good advisors. Anyone can offer information, but only the credible can offer information that is relevant, applicable and beneficial.

Seek out those who really know, not those who think they know In a world eager to offer advice, the expertise of the advice giver is essential.

 

Mark Sanborn is motivational keynote speaker and Leadership Expert in Residence at High Point University, the Premier Life Skills University. His presentations help the best leaders get better and inspire listeners to choose to be extraordinary. For more information about his work, visit www.marksanborn.com.

Author: Mark Sanborn

Mark is recognized globally as an expert on leadership, customer service and organizational performance. A member of the National Speakers Association Speaker Hall of Fame, he is the author of 8 books including the international bestseller, The Fred Factor: How Passion in Your Work and Life Can Turn the Ordinary Into the Extraordinary. Mark teaches his clients to BE EXTRAORDINARY™.

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3 Ways to Jumpstart One-On-Ones

The lumberjack said if his life depended upon his ability to cut down a tree in five minutes he would spend three minutes sharpening his axe. QI

Don’t have one-on-ones if you don’t have time to prepare.

You can prepare in minutes.

3 ways to jumpstart developmental one-on-ones:

#1. Quiet your spirit.

Don’t say, “I’ll be right with you,” when someone shows up for a one-on-one with you. Is the person you’re talking with worth three minutes of preparation?

Your pile of tasks is always pressing. Quiet your spirit a few times every day.

Three ways to tell someone they don’t matter:

1. Let’s hurry up. I have a lot on my plate.
2. I don’t have much time, let’s get down to business.
3. I have to reschedule.

Who is likely to bring their best? Someone who feels important or someone who feels like a bother.

#2. Review your notes.

You won’t remember previous conversations.

I use OneNote for notetaking during coaching conversations. It’s searchable and I write on the screen of my Surface.

Taking notes lets people know you’re paying attention. On the downside, they wonder what you’re writing. Solve this by explaining the reason you take notes and the type of notes you take.

7 things to track during one-on-ones:

1. Personal updates. Things outside of work.
2. Wins since your last meeting.
3. Ongoing concerns, theirs and yours.
4. Personal goals. Your service to others begins with understanding their goals.
5. Action steps.
6. Follow-up items.
7. Key takeaways. Ask, “What’s your takeaway from this meeting?”

#3. Show up stupid.

Cast out your inner fixer.

Don’t accept people’s monkeys.

Ask forward-facing questions like, “What does it look like if you succeed today?” This week? This month?

What’s most important to you when you prepare for one-on-ones?

What can you add to the above list?

Still curious:

A Simple Reusable One-On-One Plan

5 Energizing Conversation Starters for One-on-Ones

How to Stop Wasting Time in One-on-Ones

How to Make Your One-on-Ones with Employees More Productive

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