Month: January 2022

Your Brain has a Mind of Its Own: Brain Management Strategies

You have thoughts you would rather not think.

Your mind wanders like a cat looking for mice.

You know you know something but can’t remember it. You tell yourself to forget a bad experience and you can’t stop thinking about it. Then you kick yourself for doing it.

Your brain has a mind of its own:

You tell yourself, “Don’t worry about what others think.” What do you do? Wonder what people think of you.

I tell my brain to stay open, but I ignore myself.

Brain management strategies:

#1. Accept reality.

Forget the idea that there are two voices in your head. There’s a rowdy crowd in your head. Your boss, co-workers, customers, kids, neighbors, spouse, teachers, parents, and the dog all live inside your head.

#2. Stop beating yourself down.

I have the attention span of a chipmunk on steroids. It does no good to beat myself down for it. It’s the truth. Matters get worse when I beat myself down.

#3. Aspire without self-accusation.

Aspiration is an acknowledgement that you aren’t there yet.

Self-accusation is slop to pigs. The more you beat yourself down, the more you think about beating yourself down.

Accept, for example, that you don’t manage time well, AND aspire to make improvements. Don’t wallow in slop.

#4. Talk to yourself.

When your inner critic yells, “You’re an idiot,” say, “There’s my inner critic.” Then ask, “Anything else?” Or say, “Do you have anything useful to add?”

Lighten up. We’re all in the same boat, even people you admire.

#5. Understand others.

I met a guy from California who said he didn’t have a loud inner critic. I think he was smoking a joint. Everyone else beats themself down.

You don’t have to beat people down. They do it to themselves.

Challenge and affirm.

Correct with optimism.

What strategies help you manage a brain that has a mind of its own?

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Three Ways to be Ready to Lead

Show up like a kid peeking over the fence. Better to live on your toes than stumble back on your heels.

Successful leaders are prepared for action. They show up READY.

Three ways to be ready to lead:

#1. Ready to say YES:

Consistent results require stable environments. ‘No’ protects the status quo; ‘Yes’ disrupts.

If you aren’t careful, ‘no’ becomes your default response to input and ideas. If you frequently say ‘no’, people choose sleepwalking over engagement.

5 ways to lean toward YES:

Be ready with a first response that leans toward ‘yes’ instead of ‘no’.

1. How can you give that a try?
2. What are you trying to accomplish? Instead of simply saying ‘no’, explore goals.
3. What do you need to make this happen?
4. What needs to be true for you to take this idea forward?
5. Who is impacted if you move this idea forward?

You tell people their ideas matter when you lean toward ‘yes’.

Tip: Use caution when ideas impact others more than the idea giver. It’s easy to know what others should do.

#2. Ready to finish stuff:

Starting things is a distraction when you aren’t committed to finish stuff.

You end up overworked and stressed out when you habitually add to your bucket without taking something out.

Manageable time pressure increases concentration. Running from one thing to the next invites frustration, mediocrity, and cutting corners.

 If you’re a leader who loves to start things, finish something old before you start something new.

#3. Ready to learn:

Learners go further than knowers.

You can be ready to say ‘yes’ and ready to finish stuff, but you’ll crash and burn if you aren’t ready to learn.

1. Show up asking, “What can I learn?”
2. Stay open to learning from unexpected people.
3. Ask, “What am I missing?”
4. Record learnings.

What does it mean for leaders to show up READY?

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Two Things You Can Do that Aren’t Stupid

Everyone does stupid things. Thankfully, most of us don’t do stupid things on national television.

Last Sunday, Terry Bradshaw did a stupid thing when he joked about Antonio Brown (AB) on national television. Brown is the wide receiver for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Bradshaw said, “Put him in a straightjacket and take him to some hospital.”

AB did a stupid thing when he walked out on his team in the middle of a game.  Many think his flamboyant departure is the end of a controversial football career.

Two things you can do that aren’t stupid:

#1. Rest before you’re exhausted.

You drink water before you collapse from thirst. Give your body a rest before you’re exhausted.

Fatigue makes you stupid.

When you’re exhausted, small issues are big and big issues are overwhelming.

1. Don’t wait till you feel miserable to go home. Go home, once in a while, full of energy.
2. Take short breaks during the day, a short walk for example.
3. Do more things that give you energy.
4. Red Bull isn’t the answer.

#2. Resolve hot emotion before making decisions.

Don’t express yourself when emotion is a bubbling cauldron.

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose a response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” Victor Frankl

You need a confidant; someone you can say things to that you can’t say anywhere else.  

A confidant is on your side but won’t take your side.

People who take your side when emotion is hot:

1. Weaken relationships by fueling false courage.
2. Strengthen stupid decisions. A side-taker says, “You’re right to be upset,” and leaves it at that.
3. Neglect negative consequences. It’s stupid to say off-handedly, “Consequences be damned,” before reflecting on consequences.

What are some things leaders can do that aren’t stupid?

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