Leaders Love the Most – Leadership Freak

Leaders Love the Most

Leaders love the most. Haters ruin the most.

“All that I hope to say in books, all that I ever hope to say, is that I love the world.” E.B. White

Get out of leadership if you hate the world. Hide yourself away until you disappear in decay. But if you love the world, get busy.

The problem with the world is haters are energized and lovers are timid.

Leaders love the most. Haters ruin the most. Image of an open hand with colorful dots floating out.Leaders love the most. Haters ruin the most. Image of an open hand with colorful dots floating out.

Leaders love the most:

#1. Negative emotions may point to love.

Anger means you care. Every successful leader I know is frustrated about something.

Examine your anger. Does selfish ambition fuel your anger or do you care about the well-being of others?

Sadness means you care. Disappointment means aspiration fell short. Congratulations if you tried to help.

#2. Positive traits point to love.

Love hopes. Hate gives up. When you hear, “Don’t give up. Keep trying,” you hear leadership. The best leaders always press toward positive outcomes.

Hope is fuel for grit. Leaders give up, not for lack of grit but because hope vanished. Hopelessness leads to hate.

Love is open-hearted. Hate forces compliance. Open-hearted leaders listen and change their minds. Closed minds defend, argue, and coerce.

An open heart takes your further than a clenched fist. Image of a clenched fist.An open heart takes your further than a clenched fist. Image of a clenched fist.

An open heart takes you further than a clenched fist.

An open heart never bristles at being wrong because the desire for excellence is greater than the need to be right.

Love takes pleasure where hate resents. Always cheer when others thrive. Leaders love the most when they spotlight others.

People love to see leaders who love people. Image of a duck looking at the screen.People love to see leaders who love people. Image of a duck looking at the screen.

#3. Love elevates worth.

Hitler was a remarkable – but worthless – leader. Hate leads toward destructive ends. Worthless leaders seek to ruin.

You elevate your worth when you serve the noble interest of others.

If you want to lead, care when others don’t.

It’s childish to say, “If you don’t care, I don’t care.” Don’t let others run your life.

What do you look to see when leaders love the most?

Still curious:

How to be the Leader People Love to See

The Heart of Business, Hubert Joly

Like this:

Like Loading…

Crisis: 5 Ways to Fuel Progress When the Lights Go Out

Crisis: 5 Ways to Fuel Progress When the Lights Go Out

Never trivialize crisis with frivolous optimism. Smart people roll their eyes at Pollyanna leaders. Acknowledge bad and work toward good.

The danger of crisis is magnetism. Crisis captures your attention, dominates perspectives, and pollutes attitudes.

Leaders who focus on negativity derail progress.

Never trivialize crisis with frivolous optimism. Image of confetti.Never trivialize crisis with frivolous optimism. Image of confetti.

5 ways to fuel progress in crisis:

#1. Set people free:

When you say, “This is bad,” smart people sigh in relief. When you don’t acknowledge the beast, people focus on proving how bad things are.

Freedom to move forward begins after you embrace negative realities.

Solutions begin after you look the beast in the eye.

#2. Begin with what.

Don’t rush to assign blame when things go dark. The questions are…

  1. What’s happening?
  2. What are symptoms?
  3. What are root causes?
  4. What do we want?

Leaders who focus on negativity derail progress.Leaders who focus on negativity derail progress.

#3. Explore who.

Solutions require accountability. Holding people accountable honors ability and maintains responsibility.

Don’t do other people’s jobs.

Identify harmful behaviors.

Three possible options when things go bad:

  1. Something was left undone.
  2. Someone did something wrong.
  3. Failure was unavoidable. It was the environment. Now deal with it.

#4. Design solutions and develop new skills.

Problems persist when people repeat disappointing behaviors.

Don’t double down on current behaviors when designing solutions.

Do you enjoy solving the same problems over and over? More of the same always produces more of the same.

#5. Add support to challenge.

Maximize potential by adding support to challenge. Too much challenge shuts people down. Too little challenge invites boredom.

Support new behaviors and skills with training, coaching, and accountability.

Appropriate stress wakes you up. Adequate support moves you forward.

Bonus: Speak aspiration into crisis.

Pessimists define problems. Leaders believe this could be their finest hour.

  1. Link correction to ambition.
  2. Avoid punitive action even when laying down the law.
  3. Say, “I’m counting on you.”

What do leaders do wrong when facing dark beasts?

What has helped you stay positive in crisis?

Still curious:

How to Be Decisive and Collaborative When the House is on Fire

Staying positive during difficult times

Like this:

Like Loading…



Continue reading

7 Powers of Life Purpose

7 Powers of Life Purpose

Living without purpose is easy; just run around doing stuff as fast as you can.

Life purpose is living in service to something bigger than yourself. It’s not self-neglect because purpose provides a gallant reason for self-care.

The simplest expression of purpose is grow and give.

Life purpose is turmoil in a world filled with opportunity. Image of a confused person.Life purpose is turmoil in a world filled with opportunity. Image of a confused person.

7 powers of life purpose:

#1. Increases discomfort.

“I awake in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world.” E.B. White

Meaningful living isn’t always fun. Service is challenging.

Purposeful living is turmoil in a world filled with distraction. What opportunity will you seize and which will you reject?

When fear and love collide, love wins. Image of a boxer in shadows.When fear and love collide, love wins. Image of a boxer in shadows.

#2. Lowers anxiety.

Serving something bigger than yourself is living with love. When fear and love collide, love wins.

Anxiety about meaning is solved when you show up to serve now. Just for today, forget about the big purpose of your life and show up to serve the best interests of everyone you meet.

#3. Informs being present.

You need a reason to be here.

It’s easier to be present when you show up to serve something bigger than yourself. If you struggle with being present, refocus on the reason you showed up.

It’s easier to be present when you show up to serve something bigger than yourself. Image of a person looking up at a redwood. It’s easier to be present when you show up to serve something bigger than yourself. Image of a person looking up at a redwood.

#4. Affirms self-awareness.

Clarify purpose by knowing your weaknesses, strengths, talents, and values.

#5. Gives feet and hands to humility.

Humility is never fully attained and arrogance is never fully defeated. Life purpose helps because it challenges self-centered inclinations.

#6. Energizes the pursuit of excellence.

A purposeless person has no reason for aspiration.

Purpose is the reason to develop talent, hone skills, or reach for excellence.

decisions are easier when you aim at something. Person throwing a dart.decisions are easier when you aim at something. Person throwing a dart.

#7. Simplifies decision-making.

Decisions are easier when you aim at something. The hole makes cornhole fun. Goals aren’t always simple or easy, but they provide guidance to decision-making.

What does living with life purpose do for people?

How might we find and clarify life purpose?

Still curious:

5…

Continue reading

A Simple Reusable One-On-One Plan

A Simple Reusable One-On-One Plan

Poorly planned one-on-ones squander time. You’re thinking, “Hurry up. I have real work to do.”

Reusable one-on-one plans save time.

Provide clarity, freedom, and confidence with reusable one-on-one plans.

Reusable one-on-one plans save time. Image of a person looking at a confusing bulletin board.Reusable one-on-one plans save time. Image of a person looking at a confusing bulletin board.

A reusable one-on-one plan:

  1. Prepare in 3-minutes.
  2. Define success.
  3. Turn toward the future.
  4. Ask questions. Listen more than talk.
  5. Don’t fix.
  6. Create a goal.
  7. Challenge and support. (Design specific actions and establish accountability.)

Prepare:

Before team members show up, take three minutes to prepare.

  1. Review notes in OneNote or equivalent. Notes written on paper waste time. You can’t find them when you need them.
  2. Release stress. Breathe deep for a minute.
  3. Bring to mind something you admire about your team member.
  4. Identify how you want to show up.
  5. Welcome them with optimism.

One-on-one plans: Define the win before you begin. Image of a person trapped in an hour glass.One-on-one plans: Define the win before you begin. Image of a person trapped in an hour glass.

Define success:

Determine the win before you begin.

Ask your team member:

  1. What’s going to make this a great conversation for you?
  2. Imagine this conversation is over, what’s a great outcome?
  3. Suppose we have a useful conversation, what will we accomplish?

I'm a huge fan of spontaneity, but spontaneity is not an excuse for lack of preparation. Image of lights in hand.I'm a huge fan of spontaneity, but spontaneity is not an excuse for lack of preparation. Image of lights in hand.

Turn toward the future:

The past is a platform that can’t be changed. Explore and evaluate the past, but don’t park there.

Disappointment follows frustration when you idle in the past.

Turn toward the future:

  1. What’s happening? What do you want to happen?
  2. What’s working? What could be better?
  3. What’s not working? What do you need to stop doing? (Actions that don’t add value.)
  4. What’s holding you back? What could you do to create forward momentum?
  5. Bring up a project that’s going good and ask, “What’s making this project go well? How can you do more of that, specifically?”
  6. Bring up a recurring concern. Ask, “What have you been trying to fix this? What else might you try?” (More of the same produces more of the same.)

Successful one-on-ones always turn toward the future.

What do reusable one-on-one plans look like to you?

Still curious:

5 Energizing Conversation Starters for One-on-Ones

How to Stop Wasting Time in One-on-Ones

How to Make Your One-on-Ones with Employees…

Continue reading

A Simple Reusable One-On-One Plan, Part 2

A Simple Reusable One-On-One Plan, Part 2

“Failing to plan is planning to fail.” Anonymous

You don’t have time to rigorously plan each one-on-one. Adopt a universal approach that protects time and maximizes opportunities.

A good one-on-one plan has you listening more and talking less. Image of a curious dog.A good one-on-one plan has you listening more and talking less. Image of a curious dog.

A simple reusable one-on-one plan, part 2:

Items #1 to #3 are posted here.

#4: Ask questions. Listen more than talk.

You want engagement, but people nod and disengage when you ramble on. They’ll let you fill time with irrelevant drivel and feel relieved when they leave your office.

Talking is thinking when conditions are right.

Someone said that you don’t learn when you talk. When experience speaks, listen. But talking is thinking.

When you say, “And what else,” after someone shared something they know, you create a learning opportunity.

A good one-on-one plan increases engagement.

Zip your lip after asking a question. Silence gives power to questions.

Empowering includes preparing people to take control. Image of two cloud figures talking.Empowering includes preparing people to take control. Image of two cloud figures talking.

#5. Don’t fix.

The more you fix the more you have to fix. Give people space to solve their own challenges.

Share insights and suggestions reluctantly.

People stop thinking for themselves when you think for them.

#6. Create goals.

A good one-on-one plan always includes goals. Say encouraging things, but always seek improvement. There are two goals to consider.

  1. Personal development goals.
  2. Operational goals.

Prioritize personal development goals. Don’t worry, people who grow improve their ability to deliver results.

Lousy one-on-ones focus exclusively on operations.

Have walking one-on-ones. Movement makes connecting more comfortable. Image of gears.Have walking one-on-ones. Movement makes connecting more comfortable. Image of gears.

#7. Challenge and support.

Challenge with two questions.

  1. On a scale of 1 to 10, how challenging is this goal?
  2. How might you nudge your challenge-number up a little?

Ask the above questions occasionally, not every meeting.

Support people by offering resources, training, mentoring, or coaching.

Challenge and support include action and accountability.

Establish accountability by asking, “What do you want me to ask you in our next one-on-one.”

What suggestions do you have for a good one-on-one plan?

Still curious:

5 Energizing Conversation Starters for One-on-Ones

Solution Saturday: Stop Giving So Many Solutions

A-one-on-one-worksheet.pdf

One-on-one meetings: 4 ways to make them more meaningful

Like this:

Like Loading…



Continue reading

Saturday Sage: 7 Steps to Blow-up Logjams

Saturday Sage: 7 Steps to Blow-up Logjams

In the early days of logging, specialized loggers called River Pigs pushed, pried, and pulled logs off rocks and debris to prevent logjams.

On June 13, 1886, a log jam developed in the St. Croix River in Wisconsin that was described by a local journalist as “the jammedest jam” he had encountered. It took hundreds of men working for six weeks to clear it, eventually using steamboats and dynamite.

Logjams in life can feel like “the jammedest jam.” They lead to boredom, painful dissatisfaction, discouragement, even jealousy. Be a River Pig when you see logjams forming. The good news is enticement is better than dynamite.

Logjams block the flow of life, but a sage uses enticement to blow them up.

logjams block the flow of life, but a sage uses enticement to blow them up. Image of a logjam.logjams block the flow of life, but a sage uses enticement to blow them up. Image of a logjam.

Blow-up logjams:

The skill of enticement is like a River Pig’s ability to release the flow of logs, but we’re talking about the flow of life, not logs stuck on debris.

Enticement is using a known interest to motivate a person to experience a renewed flow of life.

Enticement makes blowing up logjams fun:

Enticement blows up logjams by redirecting attention toward unexpected possibilities.

Passengers on Southwest Airlines from Long Beach, CA, to Hawaii experienced enticement when they found a ukulele on their seat. Most of us dread long flights, but this crew gave a ukulele lesson.

Some passengers didn’t love the chaos, but it’s an example of enticing someone into a new experience. Blowing up the jammedest jam can be dangerous, but it’s worth the effort.

Enticement: 7 practical steps to blow-up logjams:

  1. Know what needs to be accomplished.
  2. Explore the highlights of their life since high school.
  3. Facilitate free creative thinking by asking questions that tap into their interests.
  4. Watch for revelations to appear out of nowhere.
  5. Challenge by asking, “What would you be willing to try that you have avoided?”
  6. Develop an agreement to hold them accountable.
  7. Celebrate the first sign of accomplishment.

Tips:

Use something like a ukulele to capture interest.

Create a safety net that instills confidence.

Create a safety net. Image of a person helping a child learnt to ride a bike.Create a safety net. Image of a person helping a child learnt to ride a bike.

An example of blowing up a logjam:

  1. Take someone for a coffee at a place neither of you have ever been.
  2. Ask, “What have you wanted to try but something stopped you?”
  3. Agree with them, “There are probably too many valid reasons not to try this.”
  4. Entice them with, “What are 5 things…

Continue reading

2 Ways to Ask Questions Like an Expert

2 Ways to Ask Questions Like an Expert

A leader who doesn’t ask questions is a know-it-all with a closed mind.

“My greatest strength is to be ignorant and ask a few questions.” Peter Drucker

A leader who doesn't ask questions is a know-it-all with a closed mind. Image of a prison cell.A leader who doesn't ask questions is a know-it-all with a closed mind. Image of a prison cell.

7 things good questions do:

  1. Build rapport.
  2. Unlock minds.
  3. Discover new ideas.
  4. Create unexpected value.
  5. Encourage learning.
  6. Gain respect. Impress the boss by asking smart questions.
  7. Inspire creativity and innovation.

2 Ways to Ask Questions Like an Expert

#1. Ask questions frequently.

The path to expertise begins with repetition.

A person who becomes an expert has done something many times. But leading many meetings doesn’t make you an expert at leading meetings.

Focused practice makes you an expert.

  1. Set aside the first five minutes of your next conversation to do nothing but ask questions.
  2. Ask people what questions you should be asking.
  3. Spend time crafting a few questions before your next meeting. You think too much about things to say and not about things to ask.

The higher you go, the more questions matter. Image looking up at tall trees.The higher you go, the more questions matter. Image looking up at tall trees.

#2. Follow questions with questions.

The second question yields better results than the first.

Ask a new employee, “What do you do for fun?” Avoid the seduction of stealing the conversation. Don’t respond with, “I have fun when ….” Instead ask…

“What got you interested in (Insert the thing they do for fun here. Say, sky diving.)?”

Use the speaker’s own words. People prefer their words to yours. Don’t say, “What got you interested in that?” Instead ask, “What got you interested in sky diving?”

First questions address obvious issues. Second questions explore meaning, purpose, method, and value.

First question: What’s your mission?
Second question: What makes your mission matter?

First question: Who are your best customers?
Second question: What made them become your customers?

First question: What’s frustrating?
Second question: How can you address your frustrations?

Why don’t leaders ask more questions?

How can leaders become experts at asking questions?

Still curious:

Life is About Questions

Questions Proactive People Ask

Source of the Drucker quote: How to Consult Like Peter Drucker

Like this:

Like Loading…



Continue reading

The Journey to True Success

The Journey to True Success

I have, in large part, become who I was when I was a kid. True success is becoming your best self. Don’t waste years trying to become someone you aren’t.

What happens when you try to become someone you aren’t? Disappointment and frustration.

True success requires you to become your true self, not the person others expect you to be. Bill George and Zack Clayton have written a book that enables leaders to pursue true success, True North: Emerging Leader Edition.

True success: I have in large part become who I was when I was a kid. Image of two kids playing in water.True success: I have in large part become who I was when I was a kid. Image of two kids playing in water.

The journey to true success:

Beginnings determine endings. When you pursue material success and neglect self-awareness you lose yourself to possessions, position, power, and prestige.

The journey toward true success begins with self-awareness. “Developing self-awareness by understanding your life story and reframing your crucibles should be the starting point on every person’s path to becoming a leader.” George and Clayton

Self-aware leaders know their strengths and accept their weaknesses. Gaining self-awareness requires introspection and feedback.

Introspection apart from feedback leads to distortion. Feedback without introspection gives too much power to others. “… lack of self-awareness leads to self-deception and errors in judgement.”

  1. Self-awareness leads to self-acceptance.
  2. Self-acceptance leads to self-compassion.
  3. Self-compassion leads to self-actualization.

“Self-actualization is the full realization of your talent and potential. Psychologist Abraham Maslow refers to it as, ‘the desire to become more and more what one is, to become everything that one is capable of becoming.” True North: Emerging Leader Edition

The sticking point:

“The hardest part of being self-aware is facing our weaknesses.” George and Clayton

Dave Pottruck, former CEO of Charles Swab, said denial is the biggest challenge we face on the journey to self awareness.

  1. Practice being honest with yourself.
  2. Reject excuse-making.
  3. Avoid blame.

True success is worth pursuing. Thanks to Bill George for his contribution.

What suggestions do you have for leaders who aspire to true success?

Still curious: The First Step Toward Self-Knowledge is Realizing You Don’t Have It

This post is based on my conversation with Bill George and his new book, True North: Emerging Leader Edition.

Learn from Bill yourself:

Like this:

Like Loading…



Continue reading

A Free 10-Minute Plan to Include Leadership Development in Team Meetings

A Free 10-Minute Plan to Include Leadership Development in Team Meetings

Successful leaders develop leaders. High performing team members crave development. But your hair’s on fire.

What if you don’t have time to plan leadership development?

Successful leaders implement a plan for leadership development. Image of a team huddle in the office.Successful leaders implement a plan for leadership development. Image of a team huddle in the office.

Leadership development in team meetings:

#1. Identify:

Identify the top two or three strengths of everyone on the team. Display your team’s strengths on the wall or create a slide in your meeting deck. It might look something like…

Mary:

  1. Relationship building.
  2. Encouraging.
  3. Communication.

Bob:

  1. Constructive feedback.
  2. Listening.
  3. Kindness.

Sue:

  1. Persistence.
  2. Energizing people.
  3. Asking great questions.

#2. Schedule:

Schedule each team member to discuss one of their strengths. Mary might kick off the next team meeting with a three minute discussion on how to encourage people.

Possible topics:

  1. What makes encouraging so important to you?
  2. What is the mindset of an encourager?
  3. When did encouraging become important to you?
  4. Who helped you learn how to encourage people? What specifically did they do?
  5. What are some simple steps to becoming a leader who encourages people?

You can’t answer all the above questions in three minutes. Choose one or two.

Post each team member's top strengths on the the wall. Image of an empty conference room.Post each team member's top strengths on the the wall. Image of an empty conference room.

#3. Behaviors:

Ask Mary to suggest three behaviors that express encouragement.

Allow time for questions.

#4. Commitment:

Ask each team member to choose one behavior they will intentionally practice before the next team meeting.

#5. Accountability:

Ask one or two team members to report on their experience at the next team meeting.

Final thoughts:

  1. Limit the time for leadership development in team meetings to 10 minutes.
  2. Schedule the entire team in one sitting. Get it done or you will forget it.
  3. Record the names of the people who are giving reports in your notes.
  4. Set small goals.
  5. Honor progress.
  6. Participate with everyone.
  7. Use an assessment like StrengthsFinders or VIA Character Strengths to identify strengths. (VIA has a free version.)

How could you modify or improve the above plan?

Like this:

Like Loading…



Continue reading